Talk review - Hugh Barton on Humanist
ceremonies. 12th November 1997
Need for secular wedding, baby naming, & funerals comes directly from
dissatisfaction with religious ceremonies. Hugh (Ceremonies co-ordinator for
the North West) talked of Christian funerals where priests hardly said the name
of the deceased, and got it wrong when they did. He called these supermarket
checkout funerals. Humanist funerals allow a full dignified celebratory tribute
to the deceased. The invited officiant visits the relatives of the deceased,
and helps them prepare a text, based on what they most wish to remember and
recollect. Officiant don’t write the text but invite the family to present
their tributes, poems and songs they associate with the deceased, and the
funeral ceremony itself presents this in an often deeply moving way. One
funeral involved a family of musicians performing together for the first time
in their lives, in tribute to their loved one. funerals can unite families. A
moment of silence is often included to allow religious people attending to say
silent prayers. Many people (even practising Christians) write to our
officiants after such ceremonies to say that Humanist funerals are the best
they have ever attended.
Ceremonies are where the public see us doing, rather than talking.
Officiants have faced audiences of 600. Weddings & baby-namings are happier
occasions, but it is equally important that all involved feel that they have
had a genuine complete ceremony. To many, a non-religious wedding means just a
visit to the Registrar’s office. In fact Jewish, Muslim, and Hindu weddings
have no official recognition, and must also involve a registered wedding.
Priests in the Christian Church are granted a license to serve as registrars
for each ceremony they conduct. It’s a situation that needs to change. One of
our officiants, Kate Fletcher, aims to gain recognition as an official
registrar herself. Many (mostly male) registrars start as assistant Registrars
and require two years form filling experience before becoming fully fledged
Registrars. Our Humanist Officiants have experience of conducting weddings
themselves, and are often more experienced in the field than the registrars.
Trained celebrants attain accreditation after a short training course,
comprising of lectures & mock ceremonies conducted in a crematorium (while
it is closed to the public). Probationary officiants are monitored carefully
before, during and after the training, and unsuited applicants are gently
screened out of the programme. It should not be regarded as easy or undemanding
work.
We were joined by three couples who are planning and preparing Humanist
wedding ceremonies, which gave this meeting a very warm and special atmosphere.
We wish them every happiness. We also thank all the officiants and celebrants
who joined us at this meeting, as well as for their ongoing dedication to
promoting Humanism through ceremonies. Anyone planning a ceremony, or wishing
to consider taking training as an officiant, (and we need you) should contact
the National helpline number, 0990-168-122. Jane Wynne Wilson’s excellent
ceremonies booklets are available from the BHA office.
© Copyright. Arthur Chappell
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