OUTSIDE
THE CLINIC
IDCI
Inspection statement by Wilbur Thorpe 0878765564533424 31st August
2015.
Frank Laurence 2543544578987007 came out of the local VD Clap Clinic, or STD Studies unit, as they prefer to call it, and I asked him for an ID Card Inspection. I did not mean to probe into his personal medical condition, but he freely, if nervously admitted to me that he had been to the clinic to me with a complaint of itchiness and swelling around the genitalia regions. His own family Doctor had recommended him to the clinic. (Dr. James Rainsbury 0987564553453543
Upon inspection the clinic’s medical advisor, Louise Blandon 6767587678668856 had apparently diagnosed an attack of Syphilis. She has administered appropriate treatment accordingly.
I regrettably feel as if I am legally obliged to disclose the fact that Mr. Laurence freely admitted to me, (without any coercion or threat from myself), that he might have contracted said disease through his use of prostitutes operating in the Chadderton area.
I am well aware that there has been an explosion of prostitution since ID Card Inspections came into force. Mr. Laurence, who is single, has informed me that he prefers them to any relationship where ID Card inspectors have a hand in how the lovers get to interact. He believes that he could be inspected on admission to a singles bar, and again on leaving, possibly acknowledging the identity of the lady or ladies he chose to leave with. He would be inspected whenever he bought flowers, chocolates, or other romantic gifts for his girlfriends. Mr. Laurence argued that there was nothing romantic about having your ID Card checked to confirm that you were romantic enough to purchase an engagement ring. Mr. Laurence mentioned that one friend, Stuart Legg (traced by myself as Number 786775675675645) had been ID Checked over each and every ring the Jeweller had taken from the tray in an engagement ring suppliers, in case he or his future bride to be, Dorothy Webber-Legg 2135957437983474 absconded with the rings on open display for them.
Mr. Laurence felt that such intrusive inspections would continue up to a wedding and beyond. He has concluded that rather than face such harassment, he will just get his jollies from street whores who won’t expect any such formalities to be involved.
I find it rather disheartening that a man mistrusts a simple honest ID Card inspection so much that he breaks the law and gets himself a dose of some Syphilis as a result. I put Mr. Laurence in touch with the Chadderton constabulary, and they arrested him for soliciting. They invited me to join them in their raid on the canal side open-air brothel used by Mr. Laurence. The names of the fourteen trollops we arrested are enclosed on the next page. Alas, they are the tips of a nasty little iceberg. There is many more of their kind at large.
© Copyright. Arthur Chappell
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