RECRUITMENT.
Dear Raymond Chamberlain 3455443543757689, of 86, Fold Street, Chadderton.
Thank you for your application to become an ID Card Inspector. Your wish to join the fastest growing workforce in the UK is much appreciated. Please find enclosed a statement of the nature of the work involved and an application form.
JOB DESCRIPTION
ID Card Inspectors (IDCI’s) have one of the most important and morally responsible jobs in Britain today. Joining the service is to become a proud member of the emergency services.
As an IDCI your job will be to check that any British Citizen is who he or she claims to be; truly qualifies for any employment or educational status they seek, and has permission to be allowed to be in any given public facility. National security and the peace of mind of the general public rests in your hands, possibly more so than in the hands of the police, with whom you will interact closely.
Naturally, many people are not suited to such a disciplined and demanding profession. The recruitment procedure is strict and formal. Only the very best will qualify.
To qualify, you should have an exemplary ID Card record yourself. Once you are given the job, only IDCI’s senior to yourself may inspect your own credentials. You will in effect be able to avoid the many spot checks and random Inspections that most of the public face in their daily lives. We have found that many people try to get the job exclusively to be able to dodge such inspections. Such individuals will find that their failure to get into the service will be recorded on their own ID Card files.
Your training will show you how to operate an ID Card Reading Machine, Retina scanner, and even SAT-NAV tracking technology. You will learn how to feed essential data into the National Identity Register, and how to make use of the information contained there too.
There are a number of avenues down which your exciting career can take you. You may wish to be one of Manchester’s growing bands of Blue Uniformed ID Inspectors, or one of their companion plain clothed companions. You may also wish to be a part time and reserve ID Inspector. This is apposition for people who wish to combine ID Inspection activity with another career. For example, if you run a business, shop, sporting facility, or a restaurant, you may wish to check the identity of the people who work for you and who purchase your goods and services. In some such professions, IDCI Inspectorship training is compulsory. Failure to qualify as an IDCI inspector in such an area could jeopardise your chances of retaining your post in that profession.
If your ID Card inspectorate warrant is for a given business or social emporium, you will not be allowed to inspect ID Cards in the wider social community. A Shopkeeper may inspect cards belonging to customers within his own shop, (other than the cards of senior ranking staff or IDCI’s). No IDCI Inspector is allowed to inspect the cards of his own family members, (i.e. a wife or husband, etc). Such practice would be considered as grounds for dismissal from the service.
You will, on passing your stringent interview procedures, learn how to approach members of the public, handle impatient, angry, and emotive individuals, how to record a report on any IDC inspection quickly and succinctly, and much more besides.
We trust that you will succeed in becoming an IDCI, and though the public may dislike you for what you have to do on their behalf, they will come to understand that their safety is down to your dedication and commitment to their protection. Be an ICI. Britain Thanks you.
© Copyright. Arthur
Chappell
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